{"id":2073,"date":"2014-06-26T09:51:57","date_gmt":"2014-06-26T07:51:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/?p=2073"},"modified":"2014-06-26T10:05:14","modified_gmt":"2014-06-26T08:05:14","slug":"which-fictional-detective-are-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/?p=2073","title":{"rendered":"Which Fictional Detective are you?"},"content":{"rendered":"
\""Let's<\/a>

“Let’s find that pint, Lewis.”<\/p><\/div>\n

For me, it\u2019s always been television detectives. There is nothing quite as fun as watching a TV sleuth figure out a murder or catch a bad guy.<\/p>\n

I think the whole thing started with Magnum P.I. Thursday nights between 8-9 were spent watching Thomas Magnum run around Honolulu chasing down thugs and ticking off Higgins. In college, Magnum was replaced by Columbo and Rockford, who I found in the wonderful land known as Rerunia. They were two totally different detectives: one was sly, clever, and purposefully disarming, the other rough, tough and gritty.<\/p>\n

A thousand years later, aka 2010, Sherlock Holmes joined the ranks of my favorite TV detectives. I\u2019d read all the stories, I found that a bowl of popcorn and the tiniest prospect of actually being able to deduce what was going on added to my enjoyment. While I have always loved Sherlock Holmes stories, they aren\u2019t really detective stories since the reader has no way of figuring out the plot until Holmes reveals it all to the exasperated Watson on the last page.<\/p>\n

Elementary, Watson, as long as you knew that in Urdu the man\u2019s cousin\u2019s dog\u2019s name backwards reads bacon. Adding to that, of course, that bacon was the favorite breakfast meat of this man\u2019s butler\u2019s sister\u2019s husband Smedrick, who resides in a place called Florida. Then it\u2019s all clear\u2026<\/em><\/p>\n

But I digress. Back to detectives.<\/p>\n

Enter Inspector Morse.<\/p>\n

At first, I didn\u2019t know what it was about Morse, why I liked him so much. But it was clear that he was something a little different. He had things in common with the other guys \u2013 bright and sharp, some degree of toughness, cool-headed. But Morse was different.<\/p>\n

So I kept watching.<\/p>\n

Morse lives alone, does crossword puzzles, and drinks. He drinks all the time. Every episode features Morse at a pub, a party, or drinking at home while listening to classical music. Almost every scene ends with him pulling his partner Lewis off to find a pint \u2013 \u201cLet\u2019s have a beer,\u201d \u201cWe have some major thinking to do, Lewis, let\u2019s find a pint,\u201d “Pour us a couple, Lewis, you know where the beer is,” \u201cHow can I think, I haven\u2019t even finished my first pint yet?\u201d \u201cKeep drinking, Lewis, the answer\u2019s in there somewhere.\u201d<\/p>\n

He quickly became my hero.<\/p>\n

But that\u2019s not all. Morse is always wrong. He is constantly arresting the wrong people with absolute, total confidence, only to realize shortly after that he\u2019s made a mistake. He apologizes more times during an episode than I do on a first date, and that is saying something.<\/p>\n

I guess what I love the most about him is that Morse is a normal schmuck. He is not a tough guy, as he\u2019s constantly getting his ass handed to him. He\u2019s afraid of heights, he\u2019s moody, and he\u2019s always getting in trouble with his boss. And he is always, always falling for a lady and getting rejected.<\/p>\n

And then I realized why I related so much with Morse \u2013 he is me.<\/p>\n

It all made sense, too. As much as I loved the other detectives, I could never really relate to them. I don\u2019t have the sly boots cleverness of Columbo, the toughness of Rockford, the casual swagger of Magnum, or the immeasurable brains of Sherlock.<\/p>\n

But I can relate to Morse: a guy who’s awkward with women and who does his best thinking in a pub. A schmo who does crosswords, fears heights, and is always on the wrong side of his boss\u2019 favor. A guy who confidently makes mistakes and then glumly apologizes, yep, this is a TV detective I can get behind. Maybe I missed my calling.<\/p>\n

Which TV detective are you?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

For me, it\u2019s always been television detectives. There is nothing quite as fun as watching a TV sleuth figure out a murder or catch a bad guy. I think the whole thing started with Magnum P.I. Thursday nights between 8-9 were spent watching Thomas Magnum run around Honolulu chasing down thugs and ticking off Higgins. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2073","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-blog"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1EvEu-xr","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2073","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2073"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2073\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2078,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2073\/revisions\/2078"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2073"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2073"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2073"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}