{"id":4808,"date":"2019-09-16T10:45:29","date_gmt":"2019-09-16T08:45:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/?p=4808"},"modified":"2020-03-09T07:21:41","modified_gmt":"2020-03-09T06:21:41","slug":"report-on-problematic-people","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/?p=4808","title":{"rendered":"Report on Problematic People"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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This report focuses on the problematic activity of three employees within the university system. This report gives suitable background, outlines transgressions in as much detail as possible, and recommends measures that may be taken to bring about the cessation of such actions. The actions here within took place during the week of September 9-13.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Terence Beckley <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Terence is a teacher of French literature and has been with\nthe university for five (5) years. He has a masters degree in French, is CEFR\ncertified as a French speaker at the C2 (proficient) level, and sometimes wears\na beret (on Halloween). Terence has had many run-ins with the university for\nhis continued refusal to get a PhD. Numerous meetings have been held with\nTerence by various university management staff in which were outlined (intricately)\nthe benefits his PhD would have for the university. Sometimes with charts. Despite\nthis intervention, Terence has maintained that he \u201cdoesn\u2019t want to.\u201d On September\n10, Terence was overheard to say \u201cMan, I\u2019m not much for this academia stuff.\u201d\nIn English. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Possible recommended actions include the university placing a required daily quota of French language on Beckley, perhaps 2,000 words. Further intervention could involve a “baguetting,” which is a form of punishment championed by Steven Seagal, but banned by the EU in 1999.   <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jim Tooms <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jim Tooms is a bachelor-degree holding ESL teacher at the university. He is an editor for the university political science journal and a \u201cbig fan of Jeopardy.\u201d Jim\u2019s infraction is having a bachelor\u2019s degree as he did on September 12, the day in question. On September 12, Jim was seen in the Foreign Language Department meeting having a bachelor\u2019s degree. He ate two (2) prewrapped biscuits at the meeting (cinnamon and hazelnut) and had one and a half (1 \u00bd) coffees with artificial sweetener (AS). It is suggested that Tooms has taken more than he has contributed to the university. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Recommended actions are to monitor Tooms\u2019 intake up through and including the Christmas party. At the Christmas party if he takes more than the bachelor degree provisional quotient (2 16 oz beers or 4 oz glasses of wine, four cookies, two slices of ham or one pork neck, a 10 oz bowl of vegetable salad, and one pocket diary as per the university\u2019s Christmas gift) then his pay should be docked and he should be sent to the salt mines. <\/p>\n\n\n\n