{"id":4963,"date":"2020-03-23T16:12:10","date_gmt":"2020-03-23T15:12:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/?p=4963"},"modified":"2022-10-31T18:29:10","modified_gmt":"2022-10-31T17:29:10","slug":"the-corona-diaries","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/?p=4963","title":{"rendered":"The Corona Diaries"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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Mar 11: Day 1 of work from home. Made list today. 2 online courses. 3 novellas to tweak. Finish novel. By the time this all blows over in April, I\u2019ll be one productive SOB.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mar 12: Pretty productive today. No online courses, but cleaned bathroom & organized T shirts from oldest to youngest and then again from lightest to darkest. Went to store, no evidence of panic buying, lots of available TP, milk, eggs. Interesting to note that pizza pastry and hotdogs are completely sold out. Gotta love Czech priorities. These are my apocalypse people. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mar 13: Need a better schedule. Getting up around 7:30 but\nnot getting to work until 9ish. Morning mostly spent drinking coffee &\nlooking through kitchen window and watching people sneeze. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mar 14: Having a friend for dinner, have sanitized and wiped\ndown everything. Will decide about sanitizing friend when she gets here. Never realized\nhow much I touch my face. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mar 16: First day of actual quarantine. OK, know it\u2019s not \u201cquarantine\u201d\nbut who the f cares about semantics at this point? Not supposed to go anywhere\nat all, but if we do, we need a mask. I feel like I\u2019ve been training for this\nfor a decade. Need to stay alert in case something bad happens. I really need\nto stop touching my face so much. <\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

Mar 17: Corona Crafts! Spent the day finding and fashioning and making masks. I have handed over my collection of pit-stained white T shirts to Burke so she can cut them into masks so we can go outside. Have found that sleep masks from airlines make good masks, but temporary b\/c they are pretty heavy and I don\u2019t want to pass out on the ground outside unless it’s from intoxication. I have my standards. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Have found old Halloween masks, Burke will use the string, but I suggested we just use the Halloween masks. It won\u2019t keep us from spreading germs, but nobody will know it was us who did it. Ha Ha. A little apocalypse humor. I hope those who come after realize my genius. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

If I’m wearing a mask, I won\u2019t be able to touch my face. Amazing how much daily energy now goes into masks. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mar 18: Review and reflection of today\u2019s Corona Day Schedule  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

7:30 Woke up, reminded myself that I can\u2019t go anywhere, had coffee, looked out window, bemoan global situation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

7:35 Realized that I am part of the elite 210,291,776 diarists of the Corona Days. I’m OK with it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

7:45 Checked schedule. How is it possible I have this much to do when the world is ending? Reflection: I have been lied to by TV. We all have. I would have learned more in Home Economics to deal with this apocalypse than in Survivor Man. I’m going to die because I cannot sew. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

7:48 Put on pants. Well, not pants, but something with an elastic waistband and long legs.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

8:00-9:50 Work.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

9:50-9:55 look out window again, bemoan situation, ensure if\npeople are wearing masks<\/p>\n\n\n\n

10:00-11:00 Check email, beg deity I don\u2019t believe in that\nmy boss hasn\u2019t found a way to annoy me from across the country. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

11:01 \u2013 dang it! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

11:02 eat to avoid doing work sent from across country.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

11:20 eat again. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

11:30-11:55 face touching period. Go nuts old man. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

11:55-11:59 scrub like never scrubbed before. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

12:00 grocery store delivery guy comes <\/p>\n\n\n\n

12:20- 12:50 wipe down packages, sanitize hands, bags, keys,\nlocks, door jambs, and cat. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

12:51 eat again <\/p>\n\n\n\n

13:00 \u2013 13:30 read near window, sanitize then take shower, lotion\nup Corona Hands. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

13:30-14:30 Corona discussion period. Burke related all bad\nnews re: Corona and I listened and then offered encouragement and suggested a\ndrink. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

14:30 Corona Cocktail hour(s) begins. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

15:00 Check email. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

15:01 hate self for checking email. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

15:30 – 19:30 Seinfeld and The Office. It’s nice pretending it’s 25 or 10 years ago. I didn’t have to wear a mask then. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mar 19: Did Corona Budget today. Bar \/ going out expenses have dropped by roughly 109%. Expenses for surgical and facemasks have gone up 29,029%.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mar 20: Observation: The number of pics of peoples\u2019 food on\nFacebook has risen dramatically. People still like to tell others what to do\nand how to feel and act, but now it\u2019s all Corona-focused. Man, were these\npeople always this annoying? Are we just noticing now because we have nothing\nbetter to do?! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

NB: Wonder if my cornflake and beef souffle is pretty enough\nfor Facebook. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mar 21: Have been informed by online alcohol consultant that\n4 pm is an appropriate time to start drinking. Beat that by an hour today.\nChecked email 12 times today. Washed hands 31 times. Terrible Corona Hands. Lotioned\n12 times. Feel like a lizard who just learned to masturbate. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mar 22: Current competition for ESL online jobs is roughly 23,002,927 people. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Stepped out for a minute, sanitized my hands, doorknobs, light switch, and sanitizer bottle. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Today I organized my T shirts from most to least syllables. I think this apocalypse is going very well so far. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Mar 11: Day 1 of work from home. Made list today. 2 online courses. 3 novellas to tweak. Finish novel. By the time this all blows over in April, I\u2019ll be one productive SOB.   Mar 12: Pretty productive today. No online courses, but cleaned bathroom & organized T shirts from oldest to youngest and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4964,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4963","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/damiengaleone.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/corona-days.jpg?fit=720%2C960&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1EvEu-1i3","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4963","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4963"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4963\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5678,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4963\/revisions\/5678"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/4964"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4963"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4963"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4963"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}