{"id":5933,"date":"2023-10-09T12:34:46","date_gmt":"2023-10-09T10:34:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/?p=5933"},"modified":"2023-10-09T12:34:46","modified_gmt":"2023-10-09T10:34:46","slug":"pain-in-the-neck","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/?p=5933","title":{"rendered":"Pain in the Neck"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

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I wake up in the morning and sit up, a good yawn breaking the quiet. It especially broke the quiet as it culminated in a yelp of pain. I froze, not because I was scared, but because I couldn\u2019t otherwise move. The dog \u2013 whose immediate morning stratagem is to play with me until she gets her belly rubbed \u2013 stopped her goofing and watched me in expectation. I walk like Igor to the bathroom and appraise my pain-crinkled face in the mirror. Ah yes, no doubt about it, my old friend the pinched nerve is back.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I remember times when my mother would be laid up in bed. She\u2019d be in a nightgown and a thick neck brace. She lay on a heated pad. We were to leave her alone (her orders) unless we were bringing food and\/or ginger ale. I also remember these times as those when we ate cold deli meats and sandwiches for all meals. Pinched nerve.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In things we get from our parents that we don\u2019t want, my 0 to Mr. Hyde in 2.3 seconds temper and my tendency to show up 40 minutes before scheduled events are up towards the top of that list. But somewhere close \u2013 perhaps between my dalliance of ear hair and mild numerical dyslexia \u2013 is my conducive-to-pinched neck. Every now and again, my neck decides it will not only go on working hiatus for a while, but will leave in its wake a throbbing, all-encompassing pain. There are people who no doubt have it far worse, but when your neck is causing a headache you wouldn\u2019t wish on Mussolini\u2019s ghost, it\u2019s hard to think of them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I go to the internet in an attempt to self-heal. I learn some stretches and they are effective, but the cure is not long lasting. Thus I begin acting like an insane person in public. On the tram, metro, in shops and pubs, I break into some yoga, neck bent, arms out. It\u2019s anyone\u2019s guess what I am doing. But I greatly fear that I am being \u2018that guy\u2019. That look-at-me guy who does yoga, plays a guitar, prays in public. I don\u2019t want to be the main character; I only want to be pain-free for a little while.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

An extraordinary fact about semi-chronic pain \u2013 wherever it exists on your body \u2013 is that I can\u2019t seem to remember life without it, despite the fact that I have lived most of my 49 years in that state. It\u2019s just there \u2013 all the time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I don\u2019t have kids \u2013 a fact that fills me with great joy. Usually. Now, of course, I wish I had someone to bring me food and ginger ale while I recuperated. The dog and the cat, love me though they do, seem to view food and drink delivery as a one-way system. Not that I can\u2019t see their logic, it would not be terrible if the cat suddenly handed me some cake. I\u2019m just saying, it wouldn\u2019t be turned down.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I wake up in the morning and sit up, a good yawn breaking the quiet. It especially broke the quiet as it culminated in a yelp of pain. I froze, not because I was scared, but because I couldn\u2019t otherwise move. The dog \u2013 whose immediate morning stratagem is to play with me until she […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5933","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1EvEu-1xH","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5933","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5933"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5933\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5934,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5933\/revisions\/5934"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5933"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5933"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/damiengaleone.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5933"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}